Welcome to Last Night on TV, our ongoing series that looks back at what happened on television the night before. If we’re going to stay up all night and watch TV, we might as well talk about it the next day.
Another mostly great season of Portlandia ended this week, and it finished with a disaster. Not just with the literal monster attack at the center of the plot but also the failure of the episode overall. “Noodle Monster” was not funny. It was not a showcase of interesting satire or parody. It was a dumb idea executed terribly. It was the most surprising disappointment the show has ever issued.
This week it was Peter and Nance’s turn for a storyline, and everything else was tied to their arc. It began with them trying out a new Tsukemen ramen place, run by guest star Gregory Gourdet. I wondered if the series was exploiting the fact that its broadcast-night cousin Top Chef had ended its season a week earlier and some of us were in withdrawal. Gourdet, if you don’t know, was a finalist on the previous season of the Bravo cooking competition show. He tells the couple not to combine their noodles and broth, just dip.
Don’t dunk the noodles, dip them.https://t.co/MHDqkGSWQF
— Portlandia (@portlandia) March 21, 2016
Well, Nance combines the two components of the dipping ramen when she adds the leftovers to their fridge, and overnight the dish becomes a giant noodle monster. It roams Portland, slurping about, and splattering stains on the clothes of all its residents. The stains wind up embarrassing the Mayor (Kyle MacLachlan) as he’s showing representatives from Nokia — which he thinks is a Japanese company — around, because they’re thinking of building a plant in town. The monster attack winds up dissuading them even more.
Meanwhile, Fred forgets his phone at home and we get bits about how we don’t know what to do when we don’t have our phones. Not even Fred Armisen could make that stale situation come off at least seemingly unique and amusing. The only thing in the whole episode I came close to laughing at, though, involved Fred and Carrie. They needed someone to toss the Noodle Monster into a pool full of broth and decide frat boys are the way to go. The frat boys started by tossing Fred and Carrie into the pool. It was an obvious set up and follow-through but it worked, especially because Carrie finished the scene complaining that her phone was in her pocket, so she’s now like Fred without one.
What's the solution? Frat guys. #Portlandia http://pic.twitter.com/y12DaTbU0q
— Portlandia (@portlandia) March 25, 2016
I get that Portlandia wanted to do something on food trends, and the confusion of Peter and Nance in the restaurant scene was certainly relatable to many people. And Gourdet was pretty great in his acting debut, enough that at first I was trying to place where I’d seen him act before rather than where I’d seen him dealing with food before. Where they went with it was much cheesier than I expect from this show. And not just the forgotten phone but also the driveway moment NPR stuff made me feel I was watching an old episode.
I’ll say this much for “Noodle Monster”: it gave me a craving for some dipping ramen. I credit Portlandia for exposing me to many hip things these days, since I’ve reached the point and place in my life where I tend to be out of it. I’d never heard of Tsukemen. I’m going to try it. And maybe I will combine the noodles and broth like more common ramen because whatever it’s not going to really turn into a dumb noodle monster.
Anyway, at least one great thing happened in Portlandia — well, Portland — this week. Put a bird on it, indeed:
For more TV reviews, check out the Last Night on TV archives.
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