The Gentleman’s Guide to Comic-Con ~ Cinenus

Photo by Robert Fure, Film School Rejects

It’s going to be impossible to escape the San Diego Comic-Con over the next few days. Beginning today, over a hundred thousand fans of all things pop culture will descend upon the beautiful city of San Diego for a convention that is solidly in place as a yearly geek Mecca. Sites such as our own will spend time and money bringing the happenings to those of you who have stayed at home to avoid the crowds, the expense or simply the hassle of putting on pants.

But for those of you brave enough to head down to San Diego this weekend with the hopes of seeing a little snippet of Batman v. Superman or being the first to hear about new casting for one of the many in-production Star Wars films, I’ve got some advice. There are plenty of survival guides out there, including this one from Fandango’s Erik Davis that polled a bunch of wonderful friends of FSR. It’s the boiler plate stuff you’ll see online every year:

Drink water.
Use deodorant.
Carry an extra battery for your iPhone.
Get in line three days ahead of time.
Remember to have fun.

I’m here with my decade of experience covering Comic-Con to provide you some additional advice. I’ve sweated alongside the best and most nerdy among you, found my way to the front of Hall H for Jon Favreau’s now-iconic debut of the first Iron Man footage. I know this game as well as anyone out there. The other thing I know: manners. As a recently wonderful Colin Firth performance in Kingsman reminds us, “Manners maketh man.” So here are a few tips for all the aspiring gentlemen out there to make your Comic-Con a smooth, enjoyable experience for you and everyone around you.

1. Don’t Be a Creep

The Comic-Con show floor is a wonderful, terrifying place. It’s where the attendees of the Con go to coagulate and collect. Setting aside the nightmarish logistics of getting from one end of the show floor to the other (seriously, someone time it for me this year — my over/under is 1 hour), there’s something magical about rubbing elbows with so many like-tempered individuals. We don’t all love the same exact thing, but we love pop culture in much the same way. This love includes a desire to dress up in a way that celebrates your favorites — everything from anime to comic characters. This also means many women and girls in cosplay, not all of which is particularly tame. Comics have spent decades portraying female characters in provocative ways to sell books to teenage boys. Along the way, they’ve picked up some readers of the opposite gender who desire to dress up as their favorite heroines.

This means that there will undoubtedly be plenty of lovely women in your immediate vicinity dressed up like Harley Quinn. Does that give you the right to make a sexist comment? No. In my years of interacting with human beings of all genders, I’ve learned one thing: everyone loves attention, but no one likes the disrespectful variety. Would you like to take a picture with someone in awesome cosplay? Ask nicely. If they say no, respect that and move on with your enjoyment of the Con. Everyone is there to have a nice time and share their love of pop culture with others. Some of them may even be paid by vendors to be there. That doesn’t change things. You will ruin someone else’s time if you make things weird.

As an example, here’s a picture of a less-chubby, decidedly less bearded version of yours truly with two lovely humans dressed as police from Hot Fuzz. I asked nicely, they obliged, it never got weird:

Photo by Brian Gibson, Film School Rejects

2. Be a Clean Person

This extends some of the traditional advice you will receive. Yes, bringing deodorant so as not to add to the already prevalent odor that is Comic-Con is highly recommended. Showering every morning is important, too, regardless of how many people have piled into your one-bed hotel room. Make it a priority. And every so often, especially while you’re making your dash to the restrooms in between massive Hall H panels, wash your hands and take a look in the mirror. This will give you a reminder to wipe the pizza crumbs from your shirt, pull your pants back up to your waste (this isn’t a plumber’s convention) and perhaps fix the hair you didn’t wash because you disregarded my advice about showers. Also a worthwhile investment: a hat. And for the love of all things holy, if you’re going to be taking a few body spray showers while waiting in line, ditch the Axe and get yourself some Old Spice. You may be able to see an ocean from the Hall H line, but that doesn’t mean you need to smell like the Jersey Shore.

3. Be Polite and Tidy

At the risk of sounding like your mother, I’ll keep this one brief. Pick up after yourself, especially when the lines move and when dining at one of the San Diego Convention Center’s many overpriced dining areas. Hold doors open for others. Say things like “please” and “thank you.” Heck, you could even do some emotional Agent Carter cosplay and throw in some “sirs” and “ma’ams” while you’re at it. As ever, I must encourage you to follow my first and foremost life rule: “Don’t be a dick.”

4. Complaining On Twitter Will Get You Exactly Nowhere

Social media is a wonderful platform, especially during a busy event such as Comic-Con. You can get updates on the ever-changing events, show floor sales and signings. You can also connect with friends, some of whom you’ll be meeting for the first time. But there’s one dark side to social media during Comic-Con: the endless cacophony of complaints. If you don’t get into something because the line was too long, just move on. If someone cuts in front of you in line for the bathroom, let’s assume positive intent and just chalk it up to them having a violent situation brewing in their digestive track (and be thankful that you are not similarly afflicted). If you miss out on a sweet giveaway or fail to find Deadpool, your life will go on and chances are that you’ll still have a wonderful Con experience. Take a deep breath and count to ten before posting a screed on Twitter. You’ll be a better person for it.

5. Don’t Hold Up the Line for Signings

Everyone wants to talk to Brent Spiner for 25 minutes about how his character from Independence Day could possibly come back for the sequel, but you have to put that desire aside, accept the autograph that you’ve paid for, and keep the line moving (especially if it’s a long one). “Hey, I really loved your work on [insert project here]. Thanks for being a part of my childhood,” is perfectly acceptable. Celebrities are people, too. They are probably just as concerned with their next meal and restroom break as you are, so don’t waste their time.

The same courtesy can be applied to seeing a famous person elsewhere during Comic-Con. One year I found myself randomly in line next to Judd Apatow and two of his kids on the show floor. A quick hello, a thank you and if they are game for it, maybe a picture are more than enough. Places to go, people to see, etc.

6. Oh Yeah, Have Fun

Sage advice from anyone you’ll ever meet who has been to Comic-Con: enjoy it. If you get lost in the frustration of logistics, spend time agonizing over missing out on a collectible or a panel, you’ll miss one of the most fun nerd experiences of the calendar year.

"The Gentleman’s Guide to Comic-Con" was originally published on Film School Rejects for our wonderful readers to enjoy. It is not intended to be reproduced on other websites. If you aren't reading this in your favorite RSS reader or on Film School Rejects, you're being bamboozled. We hope you'll come find us and enjoy the best articles about movies, television and culture right from the source.